Side effects of drinking and alcohol ... and remedies!!!

1. *Symptom: Cold and humid feet. *
> > Cause: Glass is being held at incorrect angle (You are pouring the drink on your feet).
Cure: Maneuver glass until open end is facing upward
> > >
> > > 2. *Symptom*: The wall facing you is full of lights. *
> > > Cause*: You're lying on the floor.*
> > > Cure:* Position your body at a 90-degree angle to the floor.
> > >
> > > 3. *Symptom*: The floor looks blurry. *
> > > Cause*: You're looking through an empty glass. *
> > > Cure:* Quickly refill with your favorite beverage.
> > >
> > > 4. *Symptom*: The floor is moving.*
> > > Cause*: You're being dragged away. *
> > > Cure:* At least ask where they're taking you.
> > >
> > > 5. *Symptom*: You hear echoes every time someone speaks. *
> > > Cause*: You have your glass on your ear. *
> > > Cure:* Stop making a fool of yourself!
> > >
> > > 6. *Symptom*: The room is shaking a lot, everyone is dressed in
white and the music is very repetitive. *
> > > Cause*: You're in an ambulance. *
> > > Cure:* Don't move. Let the professionals do their job.
> > >
> > > 7. *Symptom*: Your dad and all your brothers are looking funny. *
> > > Cause*: You're in the wrong house.*
> > > Cure:* Ask if they can point you to your house.
> > >
> > > Cheers!!!!!!!!

word power rearranged

DORMITORY:
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM


PRESBYTERIAN:
When you rearrange the letters:
BEST IN PRAYER


ASTRONOMER:
When you rearrange the letters:
MOON STARER


DESPERATION:
When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT



THE EYES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THEY SEE



GEORGE BUSH:
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE



THE MORSE CODE:
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE COME DOTS



SLOT MACHINES:
When you rearrange the letters:
CASH LOST IN ME




ANIMOSITY:
When you rearrange the letters:
IS NO AMITY




ELECTION RESULTS:
When you rearrange the letters:
LIES - LET'S RECOUNT




MOTHER-IN-LAW:
When you rearrange the letters:
WOMAN HITLER


SNOOZE ALARMS:
When you rearrange the letters:
ALAS! NO MORE Z 'S


A DECIMAL POINT:
When you rearrange the letters:
IM A DOT IN PLACE



THE EARTHQUAKES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THAT QUEER SHAKE




AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE:


ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
When you rearrange the letters:
TWELVE PLUS ONE

the microwave, solitaire and email id's-----You know you're living in 2006

1 You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.

2 You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.

3 You have a list of 16 phone numbers to reach your family of 4.

4 You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.

5 Your reason for not staying in touch with friends is that they don't have e-mail addresses.

6 When you go home after a long day at work you still answer the phone in a business manner.

7 When you make phone calls from home, you accidentally dial " 0 " to get an outside line.

8 You've sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three different companies.

10 You learn about your redundancy on the 11 o'clock news .

11 Your boss doesn't have the ability to do your job.

12 Contractors outnumber permanent staff and are more likely to get long-service awards. AND..............

13 You read this entire list, and kept nodding and smiling.

14 As you read this list, you think about forwarding it to your "friends."

15 You got this email from a friend that never talks to you anymore, except to send you jokes from the net.

16 You are too busy to notice there was no #9

17 You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9

18 AND NOW U R LAUGHING at yourself.

Go on, forward this to your friends .you know you want to.